CURIOUS TIMES: What’s for dinner? Brain tacos and balls pizza

By Andreas Ohrt

WAITER, THERE’S A TESTICLE IN MY SOUP: A Serbian chef has published the world’s first cookbook for those interested in recipes for balls. Yes, it’s The Testicle Cookbook: Cooking With Balls by Ljubomir Erovic, a man who has spent 20 years perfecting his ballicious recipes, and who, in 2004, founded the World Testicle Cooking Championship. “The tastiest testicles, in my opinion, probably come from bulls, stallions or ostriches, although other people have their own favourites,” said chef Erovic. His book includes recipes for testicle pizza, calf testicles in wine, and testicles with bourgignon sauce. Erovic also claimed that “all testicles can be eaten — except human, of course,” but he didn’t explain why that might be. (Ballcup.com)

EATING BRAINS ISN’T JUST FOR ZOMBIES ANYMORE: ...And if eating testicles isn’t daring enough for you, head over to The List Universe (Listverse.com). where they’ve compiled the Top 10 Incredibly Unusual Recipes, a mouth-watering list which includes Caterpillar Pretzels, Bee Larvae in Coconut Cream, Red Ant Chutney, Stuffed Pig Rectum Sausage, Fish Sperm Crepes, Uterus Sausage, Stir-Fried Pig’s Heart, and Lamb Brain Tacos. Yum!

YOU COULD BE A GANGSTER AND NOT EVEN KNOW IT: A creative bank robber in Washington State used Craigslist to hire a dozen unsuspecting accomplices for his heist of a Bank of America last week. The ad offered $28.50 per hour for maintenance workers who would show up near the bank wearing a blue shirt, yellow vest, safety goggles, and respirator mask — the exact same outfit the bank robber wore as he sprayed a guard with pepper spray, grabbed a bag of cash, then escaped by riding an inner tube down the Skykomish River. (King5.com)

NO ONE IS INNOCENT: A survey of 5,000 people in Britain found that the average person breaks the law once a day. The most common crime was speeding (admitted to by 46 per cent of respondents), followed by talking on the phone while driving (40 per cent), littering (36 per cent), and downloading music illegally (35 per cent). (Daily Mail)

RULES ARE MADE TO BE BROKEN: While we’re on the subject of breaking the law, here are the five strangest laws that are still in the U.S. legal books, despite being completely useless. In Texas, it’s against the law for anyone to have a pair of pliers in his or her possession; in Washington State, you can’t carry a concealed weapon that is over six feet in length; in Tennessee, it’s against the law to drive a car while sleeping; in Kentucky, it’s the law that a person must take a bath once a year; and Alaska law says you can’t look at a moose from an airplane. (Sbt.Bhmedia.com)

URINE TROUBLE: Japan has hosted what I assume must be the world’s first adult-diaper fashion show, as diaper manufacturers try to cash on that country’s rapidly growing market of old people who can’t hold in their pee anymore. “Diapers are something that people don’t want to look at,” said Kiyoko Hamada of the Aging Lifestyle Research Center, a leading organizer of the show. “But if you make them attractive, then people can learn about them more easily.” (JapanToday.com)

THE FUTURE OF FARTING: And while the Japanese are covering your leaky front, an American company is covering your ass with its new odourless underwear. According to GarmentGuard.com, you simply insert the “Subtle Butt Garment Guard” inside your pants, and the special carbon fabric will neutralize the smell of any discharges you might unintentionally release. But be forewarned: they advise that the invention does not work as a silencer.

DYING WITH A SMILE ON YOUR FACE: A German study has found that having an affair can be deadly for men. Not because their wives might have them killed if they found out, but because men are about twice as likely to die during sex with their mistress than with their wife. Research done at the Centre for Forensic Medicine in Frankfurt studied over 30,000 deaths covering the last 30 years, and found that 60 men had died during sex, almost all by heart attack. While only one in four died in the arms of their wife, over half of them died during an unfaithful fling, and the rest died during masturbation. One possible explanation may be that the added stress of having sex during an affair caused the heart attacks, but the researchers’ only conclusion was that the men were trying harder to impress their extra-marital lovers, and that extra effort caused enough strain on the heart to kill them. (AFP)

MESSAGES FROM BEYOND: A company called LifeTouch has launched a service which will send your final e-mail messages to five of your closest friends and relatives after you die. MyLastEmail.com allows you to store up to five messages on the company’s servers for about $10 for three years. Then, after you kick the bucket, your loved ones can retrieve your messages and finally hear what you really thought about them. “We may not be given the chance to say goodbye, thank you, or I love you...,” warns the blurb on the website, “Mylastemail.com gives you the chance to prepare your farewells in advance. The letters you prepare here are personal, private last e-mail messages that will be sent to your family and friends one day — but only after you die.”

I-READ-IT-ON-THE-INTERNET-SO-IT-MUST-BE-TRUE FACT OF THE WEEK: Farting continuously for six years and nine months will generate energy equal to that of an atomic bomb.

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